Blue skies

I am in the middle of the darkest storm. I hope it is the darkest storm I ever face, but it may not be. But throughout the last couple of weeks, everytime the darkness begins to overtake me, this line comes to mind and I sing it over and over, "I will praise You in this storm and I will lift my hands". Sometimes I have to say it over and over and over and sometimes I don't believe it but I just keep singing it over and over and over because I just have to. I can't even put into words why. Maybe the times I don't believe it, I think that if I say it over and over then I will start to believe it. I don't know. Anyways, I keep waiting for the storm to pass but I am realizing, this storm is going to rage for a while. Sometimes it slacks up a little, while other times I think it is going to swallow me up. BUT......

Today on the way home from church, another song came on about God being Holy. For the first time in the in the car that entire morning Makaley was quiet. (that is a miracle in itself) I felt God telling me to sing to Him. This song says over and over how holy God is. During the entire ride back from Springdale, the gray clouds covered the sky. There was not any blue but when I started to sing to God and tell Him, He is holy and worthy to be praise, I looked up and there was a small patch of blue sky. I felt God was telling me at that moment, "you are in the middle of this storm. It is raging all around you, but if you will let me, I will be your blue sky. I will carry you to more blue sky. I will love you through this storm and the blue sky after this storm is going to be the prettiest thing you have seen. Just trust me" I know it is odd to feel this, just from seeing a little patch of blue sky, but my perspective on life is changing. Everything about me is changing. I've always had pride in how strong I am but God is teaching me, it is not my strength, it is His. He is teaching me to let go of being in control and being strong and just let Him handle it. He is teaching me to look at a little piece of blue sky and praise Him for it, even as the storm rages around me.